POWER TO THE PEOPLE

Banks eh, don't you just love 'em?

They are known as "the Big Four", here in Oz. And they are all - not to put too fine a point on it - fucking ruthless!

In fact, it's now the Big Three as, like a creeping oil slick, one of them has absorbed a smaller, less hardy in the current conditions minnow.

Their power increases while consumer choice narrows. And a consequence of these changes is the recent advisement that the strapped for cash leviathans are increasing ATM fees, by about 300% or something equally as extortionate. Going so far as to charge for checking account balances.

And at this point I've had whats known in the business as - enough. And I'm taking my money off them. Granted, I don't have a lot, but still...

Let me tell you about banks. In short, banks take your money and use it to make more. In itself, that's fair enough, but because they are lazy/incompetent/Devil's Spawn, they obviously don't make enough to satisfy their needs (overseas trips, yachts, penthouses etc.) and so apply those nefarious account-keeping fees - fees for your money which they use to make more money. We all know of these fees. They disgust us.

Therefore, it follows that if they have less to begin with, the less they can make (Dorothy! Better sell the yacht!).

Now, of course, they'll get wise to this eventually should people en masse start withdrawing all their money. And then it'll be, "sorry, you can't have your money - we're going to keep it. In fact, be advised, it's no longer your money - it's our money and we'll use it as we see fit until such times our future earnings are secure".

The secret obviously is to either a. sneak it away surreptitiously before they notice or b. not give it to them in the first place.

Either way, only rich people need banks. The tiny interest rates banks provide are worthless to sums less than 100,000 so if you're an ordinary Joe and have, say, 10,000, the interest per annum, providing you don't ever touch that sum is about 600 bucks. Whoopee-fuckin-doo! Just let me go out and buy a...TV, half a sofa...?
And you think it's safe?
I'll just keep my money and manage it myself thank you very much, and probably make more off 10Gs in a year than 600 poxy bucks - and no fees either.

So what I'm saying is...everybody whip out their money at the same time, sit back, and watch the fatcats scramble to jettison their ill-gotten gains whilst they fight amongst themselves like rats in a bag to avoid being clobbered by the falling rubble.

Now, THAT would be entertainment!