METROSEXUAL OUT - - RETROSEXUAL IN.

Yet another breed with a fancy title.


The Retrosexual. At least according to Dave Besley, author of The Retrosexual Manual. He describes them as, "real men who, value biffo, beer and breasts". I’ve news for you, Dave – that’s not a real man for a start – that’s a Neanderthal. And there’s damn all new about them. Actually, the over-indulgence in the second usually facilitates the involvement in the first.
Australian actor, Joel Edgerton, who welcomes the return of such a man says, "bring back the Steve McQueen types". He claims he is definitely not a metrosexual, that he's "not that into preening". Asked if he was the new Retrosexual he replied, "maybe I'm just lazy".
Soap star and Matrix actor, Clayton Watson (never heard of him...and that film was shite – all of them) says, “I think girls are over guys who are worried about waxing and exfoliation”. (If true, this has been your own fault ladies. I told you to be careful what you wish for).He goes on to claim he’d rather spend his weekends at the pub with his mates rather than shopping for clothes. (That’s of course, if his woman permits it!).
He goes on to say of his self-professed kind, “we like drinking beer; we swear a lot and we hate shaving”. Aside from sinking piss, does this remind you of anyone, readers? Yeah, that’s right – ME!!!
I’ve been saying this since the creation of the metrosexual – that spineless, gay as a tutu weirdo.
I’m a man. A real man. Hairy (but not Italian hairy); I don’t cry in public and definitely not in front of other men; I don’t use creams of any sort; I go to a barber, not a hairdresser; I don’t wear cute chains around my neck or bangles round my wrist; or, God help us - flip-flops; and yes, I swear – like a f**kin trooper.
That said, I know how to treat women, though the new, emboldened "equal to men" (which is absurd) women are a bit much to handle, being that they seem to hold Germaine Greer as their Queen.
I’m educated, well-spoken (hey, between the swearwords, I’m very articulate...so much so in fact that often I have to dumb down my language to be understood) and polite.

I have written of this before (it obviously fell on deaf ears - most of what I say does unfortunately...). Now it seems what women want, according to Dave...is me. A man, who's not afraid to act or look like a man. Rough, tough, yet smart and at times sensitive (but remember, let's not get carried away. There's sensitive and there's blubbing into one's coke at the movies!)