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Wednesday, June 27, 2007

WITH FRIENDS LIKE THESE...

i have an associate - I say 'associate' because I have no actual friends, at least not what I'd define as a friend; someone who would be dependable.

Of course you have friends, people would say, nobody has NO friends. Well, allow me to introduce Norman No Mates Hoho.

Anyway - the associate. I'm off on an interstate trip and will be away for probably 48 hours. So I need to arrange for someone to feed and exercise the boys (regulars will know of my boys). I need someone on whom I can depend, for to leave them unattended for anything more than 12 hours without a toilet break is bordering on cruel. They have managed for up to 15 before, which I wasn't happy about but all credit to them, they held out without literally busting a gut - all over my floor (yuk!)
However, 12 is how I like to play it.

So I arrange with said associate (who it happens is led around by his dick - see later) to walk the boys at a certain time. He agrees - and we're good.

I call him this morning to arrange to meet so I can pay him - cause this friend doesn't do anything for free!, and he "hasn't got the money to get there" so I agreed to pay him up front. Except, when the time comes where do I find him at 1030 am? In the pub - on his third beer. Turns out some chick for whom he's had a hard on, has offered to pay for him to get hammered. Now it's - 'oh, I'm too drunk to drive, now, sorry'.

These are my friends. Lucky me

5 comments:

KB said...

Dear NNM

Here I am on hols and still reading your blog mate. Must be good stuff.

Don't leave the boys with that idiot, take them with you if you can.

Have a great trip!!!!!

P.S. Go the Mighty all Blacks!!! you know I had to mention me boys mate.

morgetron said...

This is tough. We hired my cousin to live at our house when we went to Boston. That worked out well. He's 20. Do you know any college aged kids who could be hired? Then it would be more an actual job, rather than a favor for a friend.

mutters said...

Was never goin to leave him with him, KB - are ye mad?? Christ only knows what his offspring would do to them!

He was meant to walk them, feed and water etc. Know whatta mean?

Anyway, he let me down, more importantly, he let the boys down - fuck im!

*****************

No Morg, nnm remember, hoho. The only way is an officail advertised dogwalker and the cost (much like chilcare apparently) is prohibitive.
Might have worked a way to take them with me, though.


Take care you two...

Deirdre said...

Hey M, tsk, tsk, next time just courier the boys over to me and i will look after them for free. They would have so much fun with me and my boys, park time, treat time, fire hydrants for them to visit about every 20 feet or so.
Deirdre.

mutters said...

BOYS!! BOYS!!!

Bugga, they musta heard ye, D - they're off down the road (don't even know where Canada is - just heard 'treats' and 'fire hydrants'.

Hoho.